Post this one under the files. WHAT THE FUDGE
Police in Stratford, Connecticut arrested an 81-year-old man on Monday.
According to the Associated Press, he was charged with public indecency, because he was allegedly "performing a sex act with some shrubbery."
As the story goes, the man was in his yard with the shrub. A neighbor videotaped the performance, called the man out, the man covered himself up with the top of a barbecue grill and went into his own house.
Here's hoping the barbecue grill wasn't in use at the time, otherwise we've got an entirely different weinie roast going on.
He was released on a $10,000 bond and has to return to court on August 5.
And according to the story, he didn't immediately return a call to the Associated Press.
Gee, I wonder why...
One of the coolest things about is when they stumble upon someone who's got a fresh take on an old talent. America's Got Talent
For instance, ventriloquism. Guy talks for himself, and his puppet.
Great. You don't often get the sense that the puppet's real.
But you do with this guy - his name is Paul Zerden, and his puppet is a baby.
A cantankerous little fellow who wants a bedtime story, but doesn't like scary things, so Little Red Riding Hood's wolf has to be replaced by a yellow fluffy duck.
Very clever routine, and very nicely rewarded at the end too. Check it out.
Congratulations Paul Zerdin (and child) on getting Marlon Wayans' #GoldenBuzzer!
America's Got Talent on Tuesday, July 28, 2015
Tituss Burgess and Jane Krakowski, stars of , were sitting on a plane - at least it looks like they're on a plane - with the show's creator, Tina Fey. The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
Beyonce's "Flawless" came up on someone's playlist, so obviously, the three of them had to lip-sync to it.
I mean, wouldn't you?
Keegan-Michael Key & Jordan Peele are behind the best sketch-comedy show on TV right now.
Their latest sketch applies the metrics and showmanship of ESPN's to the world of teaching. Sports Center
What if teachers got as much interest and as much pay as professional athletes.
What a world that might be, huh?
And thanks to , we know how it would be covered. Key & Peele
"A huge break in the biggest aviation mystery in decades," says NBC News reporter Tom Costello.
Debris likely from an airplane has surfaced on Reunion Island, about 600 miles away from Madagascar in the Indian Ocean.
Investigators from Boeing believe it's a fragment from a Boeing 777, and the only Boeing 777 currently missing in the world is Malaysian Airlines Flight 370, which was lost over a year ago, presumably in the Indian Ocean.
Mystery solved? Not yet, say the experts, as there's still a lot of work to do. But it's the first solid clue they've had to work with since the plane disappeared with 239 people aboard.
Talk about dedication.
A group of anti-drilling activists are putting themselves on the line - quite literally - to block an ice-breaking ship for Shell Oil from leaving Portland, Oregon.
The ice-breaker is needed to help Shell get where it needs to be to drill in the Arctic, but the folks at Greenpeace have different plans.
Thirteen of them rappeled off a bridge under which the ice-breaker must pass, and are hanging there, forming a literal human wall.
Reportedly, they plan to stay as long as it takes, and they've got what they need to survive for a bit - including adult diapers.
This could get very interesting...
Good Morning Portland with @Greenpeace @RisingTideNA #Fennica icebreaker departure delayed. Can you guess why?
350 Seattle on Wednesday, July 29, 2015
It's summertime, so that means beach time.
For those without kids, no big deal.
For those with kids, you need a degree in project management to pull that off, and even that won't help.
Freelance writer Robyn Welling, a New York Times bestselling humorist, put together a fun little video that will hit home with any parent who's ever had to pack up the kids for a day at the beach.
Can you relate? Then follow Robyn on Twitter.
Folks in Milwaukee report seeing a big cat prowling the neighborhood.
One woman managed to get a video of it.
They're calling it the Milwaukee Lion - clever, don't you think?
There are all sorts of theories on it. The two biggest:
(1) Could be a young African lion purchased as a pet and let loose.
(2) Could be a cougar, as cougars are becoming more comfortable in the Midwest.
Folks at the Milwaukee County Zoo checked - all their lions are accounted for.
Here's some fun news. The Milwaukee Lion has a Twitter account. And he's having some fun.
Lester Holt sums it up perfectly: "There is intense outrage..." around the world, especially on social media.
A dentist from Minnesota killed a noble lion in Zimbabwe that had been lured out of a game preserve.
The dentist says he paid some local guides, and thought he had all the legal permits he needed to "take" the lion.
Now the guides are being charged with poaching.
Meanwhile, another big cat is gone, thanks to one guy's willingness to pay $54,000 for a trophy head for his wall...
Helen Mirren was a guest on
yesterday - a wake-up-and-smile TV talk show. Good Morning, Britain
We have a few of them here in The States - perhaps you've heard of them?
She's telling a story about going camping with then-boyfriend Liam Neeson - he of the "very particular set of skills" - and mentioned that it "pissed with rain, non-stop."
Turns out you can't say that word on TV in England.
When Helen asked why she couldn't say that, the show's co-host explained they could debate it, but they'd get fired.
"You might be the Queen, but you can't say that."
Watch the video. The whole exchange is pretty funny.